"I need another story..."

This is very true. I feel like some days I'm having the time of my life and others I feel like I'm going in slow motion.

I just started as a brand new nurse. Completely on my own. No strings or umbilical cord to keep me tied. I feel such freedom and yet I feel so scared. I did 6 days in a row and everything was great. I had a rocky first day, I felt like my brain was trying to catch up with what my body was doing. I kept forgetting to get things and kept forgetting to bring prn pain meds. One PA made a joke to me which completely made me want to cry but I held it together cause I knew he was only joking and it was a completely harmless joke. He and I were on the same page after that. He's pretty awesome. In fact most of the Neuro PA's are pretty awesome. After that moment, I knew I would be OK. Well, then I had to call a doc on my own. Which was different but the same as when you have a preceptor. I've called and spoken to doc's plenty of times before, but only with a preceptor close by to make sure I say the right things. Now it's ALL on me. Scary but very freeing. Like not wearing underwear under a dress. Then after THAT moment, when it was all over and the doc heard me out and I gave all the appropriate info and the convo finished, then I knew I would be OK.

"Want you to make me feel like I'm the only girl in the world...like I'm the only one who knows your heart..."

Went to visit Anthony this past weekend. Every time I see him we talk more seriously about being married and having a future together. It's amazing. I've wanted this for a while and I knew that he wasn't ready the whole time I was but now I feel like we're on the same page. He doesn't want me to sacrifice anything I want to do and the same for me about him. We completely support each other. Everything is so great right now with he and I. It's amazing.

Tonight and tomorrow night are my last nights of freedom and then it's back to the grind.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!!
♥

This week has been absolutely crazy. Lets start with last Friday, the work week from hell. I worked 6 days in a row so from Friday night thru Wednesday night. By the time wednesday rolled around I was dead tired and just wanted it to be 0700 on Thursday morning. during this whole escapade, I was pretty sure my friends had forgotten about me but lucky me, they popped up to see me on Thursday morning during good morning med time. I was much pleased. =]

This weekend I came to see Anthony again and even though I missed out...again on doing something with my friends, it was worth it cause seeing him makes me less of a grumpus. Sometimes I just feel like my relationship suffers with my friends cause we're on two different schedules right now. I work nights and they work days and we never see each other. Well almost never. I'm not really sure how to feel about this. Part of me is sad, but part of me feels that this is how it's supposed to be. I mean, this is the path that is being laid out for me. I'm going to marry Anthony and we're going to have a crazy army life together with children and a dog (which is going to be pretty exciting and I'm naming the dog Jeffery) but at the same time, these are my friends and I do miss them. We'll get it figured out, its just difficult right now. But life would be boring if it was too easy.

On a happy note, I saw Beth yesterday, which always makes me happy. She's almost done in San Antonio and that makes me sad...BUT she is moving on to continue her army nurse work in Maryland. =] I think weekend after next, I'll come back and take a tour of post, one where I can walk around and see lots of things and take pictures (I NEVER remember my camera anymore), and we can just hang out and be merry. Maybe we'll drink some more Dosaritas. =]

Time to make fried chicken with my lover boy. =]
Back to Belton tomorrow morning.
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So I finally have internet in my apartment. It makes my life so much better because now I can pay my bills without having to track everything with me to the amenity center. I still don't have a washer and dryer but I'm ok with that. I don't mind going to the amenity center to do laundry, which desperately needs to be done tomorrow because it gets me out of the house. I also use the amenity center to work out. Today I didn't work out...bad me. But tomorrow I will. Anthony and I are doing this competition thing to see who can run the most miles in a month. Now I know what you're all thinking "what are you crazy, he run way more than you cause of the army" well, it'a all about timing and energy level. This week I have the time and the energy to run at least 2 miles a day (minus today) which puts me at 10 miles for the week (we started this whole thing yesterday). If I complete 10-12 miles each week until december 9th which makes about 4 weeks then I'll have ran 40-48 miles this month. Crazy when you think about it. I wanna try and run 40 miles this month and just keep increasing miles per month as I go. It's an accomplishment thing for me cause I never work out. Oh yeah, the winner, whoever runs the most miles in a month, gets a prize! I'm not sure of the prize but it'll be a good one! =]

Work is great. I'm officially done with orientation and will be starting on my own Friday night. Exciting but scary at the same time. I really can't wait! I'll update after my first week of work is over. I'm hoping I make enough PTO to be able to fly home and visit my family. They miss me and I miss them so much! I'm missing out on a bunch too, like Camden, my little bro, drives now. WTF mate? My little brosuf is driving. This is ridiculous. Seriously. But I'm way proud of him. =]

Alright. I have nothing else to say. I love you all!

♥